Authentically Mine

If there was any doubt that this cold and misery we call winter in New England will end, it is official that it will. The university where I work has come out with its list of summer course offerings. Which by the way is, as far as I can tell, IDENTICAL to last year's summer course offerings, except that the Writing Seminar I would need is being offered.

Now that I know for sure that the two classes I can choose between are being offered I have to revisit my original questions. My decision is that I am going to take a class this summer and a class this fall and see where that gets me. If I LOVE psychology I will take more classes in that. If I love creative writing I will take more classes there. I have talked to many people and for either path I have to take 3 courses in the area before I can apply to the master's program. So the truth of it is I could take up to 6 classes before I decide. It will probably be more like 4 (2 in each area).

So for this summer my choices are:

Abnormal Psychology (I got them to waive the Intro to Psych prerequsite since I have taken it in High School, College and I took Developmental Psychology post-grad)

This course is an introduction to the study of psychopathology. It focuses on theoretical models of abnormal behavior as they relate to the definition, etiology, and treatment of mental disorders. Diagnostic classification, and behavioral and biological features of the major syndromes of psychopathology are emphasized. Prerequisite: Introductory course in psychology. This all just sounds fascinating to me.

OR

Introduction to Graduate Research Methods and Scholarly Writing in the Humanities (the writing seminar that I would need)

This proseminar focuses on the research, writing, and critical and analytical skills necessary to produce a successful graduate-level research project in the humanities. Attention is paid to the development of close-reading skills and to strategies of textual analysis, as well as to the vocabulary of describing the structural and iconographic features of artifacts. The course explores these topics through an investigation of the Gothic. Works to be studied include Northanger Abbey, The Mysteries of Udolpho, Frankenstein, Dracula, short fiction by Poe, and a selection of modern Gothic tales.

Now I know there are some who LOVE these kinds of stories but I am not sure that they are what I want to spend my summer reading. Yes I know you are thinking....."but you DO want to spend your summer reading about abnormal psychology?..... call me strange. There are different types of the seminar offered each semester so I could choose a different topic seminar for writing too.

Oh I know all these words and hemming and hawing ... just pick a damn class already and I can take the other one next semester.

OK so I picked a course. I am taking Abnormal Psychology this summer. I am so excited and I cannot even officially enroll until March.

I am angry and hurt and sad. :(

I took Marley swimming like I have every week for over 18 months. She is always a spaz when she gets there because she is so excited and she is always dying to get in the pool.

Just like every other week she goes into the pool excitedly and she has her regular swim. Then when her time is up we get her out and dry her off and we are talking...and well Miss Marley the sneaky pants water LOVING lab goes back up the ramp to the pool and starts to step in it. I say, "MARLEY NO!" and she belligerently steps in and lays down on the steps. Then as I get closer she swims a loop then gets out.

I look at the owner and say, "I am not sure if I should say "bad dog" because I don't want her to equate the pool with bad".... as if a lab could equate bad with anything water related.

When Marley finally gets out of the pool the owner looks and me and says, (did I imagine the snootish tone?) "I think you really need to look into getting Marley under conrtol," she pulls you in here and obviously doesn't listen." When you said, "No." she should have froze. WTF? Is she nuts. A lab? A pool with water? and she thinks she is going to freeze and stand still? Why don't we just parade squirrels around in front of her to and expect her to stay.

Of course I immediate get internally defensive but keep it in. She thinking Marley has issues has NEVER come up before, not in the entire year and half we have been going there. Mentioned in passing maybe but never spoken to me like this before. Then she launches into saying, "You know, Marley needs to know who is boss AT ALL TIMES." Now granted Marley is a challenge. I know and admit this. We adopted her sight unseen and she barks too much for my liking and is very independent, not a snuggler and can have selective listening. This woman works with dogs all day and has to understnad that not all dogs are model dogs and good dogs can be challenging. We have done OK for 8 years with Marley.

As an aside Marley is a breeze client this woman - all she does is sit on the edge of the pool and throw a toy and Marley swims and retreives it and the swimming helps strengthen her muscles and get out some extra energy. The woman does not even need to get in the pool with Marley as she needs to with at least 50% of her clients. She gets $37 dollars for 30 minutes and all she has to do is throw the damn toy and Marley and I are happy.

The woman continues on about how she is concerned and worried about my safety and what IF something happens with Marley and another dog, or what IF Marley pulls me down.

I felt so insulted as if someone just criticized my child, my husband or my parents. I feel it is as if suddenly she only wants "good" dogs - or only thinks "good dogs" are the all the time well behaved ones. I was "this" close to telling her that if this is suddenly going to be a problem we do not need to come to her place any more ... but we have already paid for the next 3 visits and Marley loves it and the extra exercise helps.

I feel like for 18 months this has not been an issue and now it is. And last week she made me feel badly because she said she was "cutting us a deal" and not raising the prices on us because she knew money was tight. I did not ask for that and if she was trying to be nice she should have taken my payment and never said anything about the increased price. This was the same week a bank maintenance glitch caused my ATM card to be declined. We pay 3 weeks ahead so it was not like we were behind and stuff happens. She said it was fine the next day when we dropped a check off but after seeing her every week for a year and half I felt weirdness.

So it is the 2nd week in a row I have left there with a bad vibe from her and if she thinks Marley is out of control I have to start wondering if it is worth it. Plus she never says any of the negative stuff to Adam.

I know Marley has given none of this a passing thought. In fact by Marley's standards the woman could hate her and as long as Marley gets to swim, Marley will be happy. I feel sad though for Marley. I think I need to go snuggle with her.

I have been trying to get the right balance for a few months now of getting enough calories into me so I don't lose any more weight while I am on this daibetes medication. The trick is getting enough calories into me without getting added sugar or too many added carbs. Tricky it is.

I think I have a way to work on it. My doctor recommended Ensure which is expensive and gross. I am taking the Starbucks 2% Sugar Free Mocha Latte route. Still expensive but a lot more yummy.

See the comparisons: Some additional vitamins in the Ensure but for filling me up and getting me the calories....I vote Starbucks all the way!

Starbucks 2% Sugar Free Mocha Latte - $12.20 per week
Serving Size 20 fl. oz. - fills me up!
Amt Per Serving
Calories 240 - good for me
Fat Calories 80
Total Fat (g) 9
Saturated Fat (g) 6
Trans Fat (g) 0
Cholesterol (mg) 35
Sodium (mg) 190
Total Carbohydrates (g) 24 - not too bad
Fiber (g) 0
Sugars (g) 22 - eh.
Protein (g) 16 - good for me
Vitamin A 15%
Vitamin C 0%
Calcium 50%
Iron 0%
Caffeine (mg) 150

Ensure Plus- $8.49 for a week but 1/3 the amount of fluid ounces.
Serving Size 8 fl. oz. no way does it fill me up ~
Amt Per Serving Calories 240 - good for me
Fat Calories 80
Total Fat (g) 9
Saturated Fat (g) 6
Trans Fat (g) 0
Cholesterol (mg) 35
Sodium (mg) 190
Total Carbohydrates (g) 50g for almost 1/3 of the amount of beverage
Fiber (g) 0
Sugars (g) 22 - same but for almost 1/3 of the amount of beverage
Protein (g) 13 - only a little less
Vitamin A 60% - better here
Vitamin C 30% - better here
Calcium 30% - LESS that the Cafe latte
Iron 0% - 25%
Caffeine (mg) 0%